Who Am I Really?

Who am I really? I often ask myself this question as I journey from one chapter to the next. I live my life from page to page writing new entries daily. Things that were intriguing during the preface seemed to lose their effect somewhere around the second chapter but failed to find replacements. With age and responsibility I have gained maturity as well, but who am I really? One of the biggest struggles I've faced in life is establishing my true identity. Too often I tended to let "what I did" define "who I was." I've even had nicknames that had personalities of their own during different stages of my life. After my collegiate football career ended it was difficult for me to find satisfaction and contentment with where I was career-wise. My entire life to that point had been shaped and molded by my involvement with football. I had opportunities to travel across the country for camps and games, met many famous and influential figures, played in front of thousands of fans weekly and even millions during nationally televised games, and gained enormous support for my music by composing game-day anthems for The University of Southern Miss. But, after it was all said and done I was still left with the question, who am I really? It's taken time for me to understand that just like people come into your life for a reason, season, or a lifetime, so does an experience. My self-satisfaction was tied understanding the purpose for each one of life's turns, and the wisdom to know how to apply the lessons learned. Proverbs 4:7 tells us that "Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding." I finally realized that I was taking things that were only meant to serve a particular purpose and trying to make them a permanent fixture in who I am. I had to tell myself, "Jonathan, Don't Lose Yourself Trying To Find Yourself." From a young age I saw the importance of taking the time to "Dress For Success." I figured out what principles I would base every decision on regardless of circumstance: Intergrity, Commitment, Obedience and Nobility. I made the conscious decision to be an ICON. Does this mean that I have my life figured out? No. In all honesty, I still hadn't figured out if I'm even on the right path, but, I do know the answer to the question, "who am I really?"

I'm Jonathan.

Don't Lose Yourself Trying To Find Yourself

If the most successful people in the world would be completely open about their lives, I'm sure they'd tell you of a time when they felt lost and confused. I can imagine them talking about waking up one day and realizing that they did not recognize anyone around them. They would probably say that they were so busy focusing on the goal until they forgot to enjoy the process. Well, in that case, they are no different than you and me. I've also realized that I get so busy preparing for tomorrow until I forget to enjoy today. There have been plenty of missed opportunities that I could have spent with family and friends. Even chances to enjoy the fruits of my labor have been sacrificed because I was too busy focusing on the next thing. Solomon wrote in Ecclesiastes 2:24, "A man can do nothing better than to eat and drink and find satisfaction in his work. This too, I see, is from the hand of God." As I matured, "... I put away childish things" (1 Corinthians 13:11), but I never intended to lose touch with my inner-child along the way. That's what makes me....ME. I am spontaneous and fun-loving; not this super serious person I've become. Who wants to spend each day thinking about bills and doctor's appointments? Life is too short to not enjoy every moment of it. Carpe Diem! Seize the day! I will not let life pass me by while I prepare for old age. I will learn to enjoy each and every day. I will no longer let my goals and ambitions take SOLE possession of my thoughts. I will "live a little." Don't Lose Yourself Trying To Find Yourself.

Show Me Who I Am Before I Mess Up Who I Can Be

If only you could see what I can see in you." Have you ever heard or said these words? It's hard to watch someone with so much potential throw their life away simply because they can not see who they were predestined to be. Often times even those around us have no idea of all the great things we have the potential accomplishing. My parents stayed on my case as a child about hanging with the wrong crowd and doing things that would only lead to destruction. I can still hear my mother saying "If you stay on this course you'll only end up in jail or in the grave." Apparently she'd lived long enough to know a little something about life because the majority of those same friends are or have been to jail, are addicted to drugs and alcohol, and a couple have even passed away. Honestly, I always knew God had bigger plans for me. It was just a matter of me accepting and embracing it. As a kid, I dreamt of being an astronaut that would explore the heavens above, but my actions kept my feet nailed to the floor. Just like Jacob wrestling with the angel in an attempt to discover his true identity, I wrestled with my desire to be "cool" by doing things that were not so positive. I consistently ignored my parents' warnings about the company I was keeping until one day I saw the police outside of the house we would typically hang out at with my friends handcuffed. I realized then that the path I was traveling was indeed headed for destruction. School and sports eventually started to occupy the majority of my attention and I began to excel at both. I was selected by Duke University to take the ACT in 7th grade and scored a 17. In 8th grade I played my first varsity football game and was a full timer starter by the 9th. I eventually graduated high school with honors and earned numerous scholarships in football. I'm thankful that along the way I had teachers, counselors, principals, coaches, friends, and family that saw the potential I possessed and challenged me to fulfill it. I have kept my eyes focused on my goals and have accomplished many things along the way. I own my business, as well as hold a corporate position at a well-known company in the food industry at the age of 24. God has truly blessed me with a vision to strive for, all the skills and tools necessary, and a humble spirit that trusts in Him to lead my path. But first, He took the time to SHOW ME WHO I AM BEFORE I MESSED UP WHO I CAN BE.

I aM mE

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It Only Takes One

One problem that we as people have, is selling ourselves short when assessing the power that we all possess. Every movement, revolution, etc started with ONE person. Many of us choose not to go to the polls to vote for our elected officials because we do not believe in the power of our voice. Our lives are dictated by others because we will not stand up for what we believe.  Instead, we quietly sit down and follow directions. The Bible tells many stories of individuals who made significant impacts on our faith and history simply because they did or did not realize the difference they could make. Adam's transgression in the Garden of Eden cursed us all to have a sinful nature. Moses, along with the help of God of course, rescued over a million Jews from Egyptian bondage. Jesus served as the sacrificial Lamb of God, to redeem us all, and gave us the opportunity to choose salvation. The power that we all possess, and the impact that it can have on the lives of others is incredible. Sometimes, certain situations are necessary in order to bring out power we never knew we had. The old saying, "The most dangerous man is the one that's backed in a corner," is correct. Think about a mother who sees her child in trouble. There is no limit to the extent that she is willing to go to protect him or her.We never know our true strength until it is tested.  When we have no other choice but to fight, we see what we are really made of. It is at this point that we understand that we have the ability to make a difference. Just imagine if Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr had not had the confidence in his dream. Or, what if Thomas Edison had not believed he was intelligent enough to create the light bulb? African Americans would still be treated as second class citizens, and we would all be walking around in the dark. So, the next time you feel that you alone can not make a difference remember, It Only Takes One.

Go For What You Know

There are times in our lives when we are faced with decisions that may seem to "go against the grain" from what everyone else sees as normal or possible. These are the times that define us and solidify what we truly believe and stand for. I've learned that life is about growing and maturing, which may give us new "eyes" for certain things that we've seen differently in the past. But, our core principles should not change even with this growth. I am still the same person who has always placed my faith in God to open doors of opportunities for me, but now I realize that He is much more than that. I now see selfishness in only wanting the gifts without accepting the Giver. Going for what you know isn't always the easiest thing to do, especially when the people closest to you don't agree. Sometimes they will even go to extreme measures to discourage your efforts. Even our closest friends and family are jealous of our growth and fight hard to not be left in their misery without company. But, we must stick to our guns and do what we know is right. In 1 Samuel chapter 14, Jonathan's faith in God led him to take only his armor bearer with him into battle against the Philistine camp of about 20 soldiers. After receiving confirmation from God that it was okay to attack, (1 Samuel 14:8-11)  Jonathan and his armor bearer headed towards the enemy camp to fight. God honored Jonathan's faith and caused the Philistines to begin fighting and killing themselves! Upon hearing the commotion, his father Saul became enraged that someone had attacked the enemy without his consent and sought to know who had done such a thing. After learning that it was his very own son, Jonathan, Saul commanded the priest to stop praying for him! (1 Samuel 14:19) Our history on Saul tells us that he was a very jealous man. He was jealous of the Israel's faith in David, Jonathan's friendship with David, and his own son's faith in God. This goes to show that even your closest of kin can be the culprit that is trying to bring you  down. Regardless of what anyone says, we must do what we know God has laid on our hearts to do. Go For What You Know.

Defeat Does Not Mean I Am Defeated

Throughout my life, I have been faced with various situations that could have easily caused me to give in and give up. I'll be the first to admit, that picking myself up off the dirt has always been easier said than done, but knowing that it was necessary for my progression has generally helped lighten the blow. In sports, losing one game doesn't mean the entire season is gone to waste. How else do you explain being able to "lose the battle but win the war?" The same concept applies to the game of life. Setbacks, roadblocks, disappointments and some flat out defeats do not happen to make you quit; they're meant to be tools of growth and maturity. We have to utilize them as learning tools and gleen valuable lessons from them. What mistakes did I make? How can I do things better? If I can do things over again, what would I change? The problem is, we allow these disappointments to pin us down for the 3 count. We give up too easily. "Well, at least I tried" is a lot easier to say  than "defeat doesn't mean I'm defeated."  But, it's all in our minds. How mentally tough are we? Even then, there are still some things we have to speak into existance by literally telling ourselves that we can overcome our situation. I know some people will think we are crazy but so what? I takes being borderline crazy to have the resilency necessary to get the most out of life. Proverbs18:21 says, "Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof." Life is not about what happens to us, it's about what we do in response to it.

How have you finally overcome an obstacle than once stood in your way?

Former U.S. Marine Anthony McDaniel lost both legs and an arm fighting for our country.